Holy Cow! Its been awhile since I updated. I think that is the norm in blog world though...its been crazy hectic lately, because of the holidays...I'm so glad they are over! I don't think I would get all stressed out if everyone else would act at least a little bit sane. I don't understand why everyone is so rude and mean and inconsiderate during the holidays. They are supposed to be a time of joy, but everyone always seems so miserable. I just don't get it. Probably never will.

On the work front, they laid 7 people off and I am a bit scared of what will happen next. We also closed one of our small warehouses in Fort Wayne. I was hoping for a raise with my new position, but I'm scare to ask. Right now, I am just happy I have a job at all! Customer Service is pretty nice. It's a bit slow right now, but that works since I am still learning some aspects of the job, and it's easier to learn when things aren't so crazy. I know things will pick back up this summer. Maybe not as busy as summer time usually is, but I think things will pick back up. Hopefully the people that got laid off will get their jobs back soon. I still have to go back to my old job twice a week, at least until summer break. I don't care much for it, but again, at least I still have a job.

Money is pretty darn tight. Luckily Dustin's (my roommate) parents are understanding and very generous and they work with us. My gas bill was 200.00 this month and I almost cried. They paid the bill and we are making payments to them on it. I got my w-2s back and filed my taxes already. I am filing bankruptsy with my tax check. I have too many doctor bills and credit cards and I am tired of the constant calls threatening to garnish my wages.

My brother offered to let me move into his house, but I don't want to do that unless I have no other option. I love my house. It's small, but its on a quiet street and I have a large back yard and I am as happy as I can be here. Molly can run and play and she loves it here too. My cats are happy. They sit and look outside all day long and seem very content. I get along well with my roommate and while money is tight, we are making it work.

I am still pretty lonely. I have no life right now, lol....I work and come home. I play with Molly, surf the net and watch t.v. I miss Joe something awful some days, but then other times, I am glad he is gone. I guess that is also part of the healing....I wish that things could be resolved I guess. He won't talk to me about it at all....he just packed his stuff and left...like he was glad that I have him a reason to leave....and maybe thats true...maybe he wanted to leave...he sure could have gone about it a better way. He kept denying everything...even when I had proof of the drug use, he just kept saying it was a lie....and that the women he talked to were "just his friends". Its so frustrating because I haven't gotten any closure. He just up and left....no explination, nothing....GRRRR!!!!

Oh well...I know I am better off....wish I could find someone so I am not so lonely though.